Reason #118 – I don’t want to know about my son’s health
Reason #118 – I don’t want to know about my son’s health
Nov 29Let’s reach the bottom of baby injuries as a topic, and move on.
Today we went on a day trip to a lovely mountain farm, complete with chickens, bunnies in hutches, and the cutest baby calves I’ve ever seen. After a plentiful lunch we took a walk down to a nearby creek down the rockiest, muddiest, steepest excuse for a road you could imagine.
One of my walking companions, a lady I’d just met, was going crazy with the ostrich warnings:
Lady: “Oooh, mind the boy! He might fall!”
Me: “He falls all the time. He’s 82 cms, it’s no big deal.”
L: “But he could fall on a rock!”
M: “He does that all the time too. Didn’t you see the bruises?”
L: “But he might hit his head!”
M: “Nah, the baby Judo lessons paid off and he finally learned to use his arms to shield his head when he falls.”
Etc.
And while none of this is news for anyone who reads my blog, it suddenly reminded me of the immortal words I uttered before leaving on my amazingly childless New York holiday.
Words that would probably warrant taking C from me and placing him with a foster family.
Words that could really get me into the Bad Mom Hall of Shame.
[DISCLAIMER: the following content may be upsetting and cause headaches and ulcers. Read at your own risk.]
Before I left on a “romantic” trip to New York, after all instructions, requests and warnings had been given to Adi and Ms. Lilly, I added this final request:
“The boy is gonna fall and hurt himself for sure, and I won’t hold any bumps or scratches against you. Just please don’t tell me about any injuries short of a broken bone. If it’s just diarrhea, a gash or even a fracture, do what you gotta do and don’t tell me till I come back, please.”
I was born ready for my Bad Mom award.
–
PS: I am trying to choose a new theme for my blog. Care to vote? The options are right on the 1000 Reasons Facebook page, just click ‘Like’ on your favourite! And if you haven’t liked the page itself yet, this is a good moment to do so and find out aaaaall that you’ve been missing!
Eh. I’ve seen steeper. She actually said “Mind the boy?” What is she, the voice of the Underground?
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
November 30th, 2010 at 7:58 pm
ROFLOLMAO!! You deserve an award for that “Voice of the Underground” quip. Email me and I’ll send you an exclusive Blessed Child photo!
[Reply to this]
Another option — nag them right back. If they’re of a certain age, you can pull out all the stops on awful old person stereotypes (don’t break a hip!). If not, you may need to get creative. Aren’t you worried, wearing that lovely X out here, that a bird will crap on it? WATCH OUT!
Daisy recently posted img-0551
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
November 30th, 2010 at 3:04 pm
Goddang it, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I LOVE the way you think!
[Reply to this]
Daisy Reply:
November 30th, 2010 at 3:18 pm
Then dang it, head over to my blog and start stirring up some ____!
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
November 30th, 2010 at 3:39 pm
Yes’m!
if you save me from legal proceedings in the States? I’ll practically be your indentured servant, right?
CDG recently posted Snow Fight
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
November 29th, 2010 at 9:30 pm
There’s no such thing as a free new identity… mwahahah!
[Reply to this]
for god’s sake, woman, stop letting the boy play! can’t you see that you’re exposing him to HARM?
sheesh.
my bosses are *still* asking me if my small boy is okay, three weeks after he bonked his head on the floor at his birthday party, because they saw him fall while wrestling with three older kids (with whom he spent the first two years of his life, and with whom I trust his safety as much as anyone, myself included) while I was busy drinking wine and talking with adults in another room.
pretty funny, that, since I’m their nanny.
whoops.
CDG recently posted Snow Fight
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
November 29th, 2010 at 3:55 pm
I would SO hire you to nanny the BC! If only I could afford you… *sigh*
[Reply to this]
CDG Reply:
November 29th, 2010 at 4:03 pm
aha, but Carmela Gonzales will need a job when she’s on the lam from the law!
CDG recently posted Snow Fight
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
November 29th, 2010 at 5:48 pm
Does that mean I’ll get you at the extra-cheap illegal immigrant rate? Woo woo!
heck, my comment was ruder than yours! lol…
chrissy recently posted WHO NEEDS MARRIAGEPAGE 1- JOURNAL 2
[Reply to this]
LOL,u are more diplomatic than I am…Hopefully she got the hint..
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
November 29th, 2010 at 9:15 am
Goodness, you call THAT diplomatic? And I thought I was being rude-ass!
[Reply to this]
drives me mad! – I make it a point never to say anything to another child if their mum is watching but silent – mummy knows best ;) – *ugh* now I’m sounding holier than thou!
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
November 29th, 2010 at 7:34 am
Well, I got inspired to restart the ostrich project, so it was ultimately a good ostriching!
[Reply to this]
Naw, u aren’t bad, people just THINK they are being helpful when in fact they should just butt out… Since u were in vicinity of your son, then that should of been a clue that u would be the best judge… Next time that happens say : ” Well, I’m his mother and will be till eternity so I think I know if he’s gonna induce a head trauma or bleed to death, so don’t worry about my son, thank you”.
chrissy recently posted WHO NEEDS MARRIAGEPAGE 1- JOURNAL 2
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
November 29th, 2010 at 7:33 am
I ended up saying: “Listen lady, he’s a KID. He WILL fall down a lot, and I am not gonna restrain or bubble wrap him. Look at how much fun he’s having!”
[Reply to this]