Reason #136 – I force my toddler to eat food that makes him sick
Reason #136 – I force my toddler to eat food that makes him sick
Jan 20There is a type of food my son can simply not stomach. Whenever I feed it to him, he either becomes a vomit geyser or gets the kind of diarrhea we call “shoe spray” here.
(Hey, I never promised this would be a tasteful blog. At least you’re learning some Spanish. Now repeat after me: pringapié, pronounced prin-gap-YE. You’re welcome.)
And yet, knowing its nefarious effects, I insist on feeding this kind of food to my poor toddler.
What am I, crazy?
I must be.
Because it seems C is allergic to organic food.
I noticed it the first time when I fed him an organic pita with greek salad. It was something Gwyneth Paltrow would have fed her own children, I swear, and I felt more than a bit self-righteous and proud of my good mamma ways. My reward for this feat of virtuous feeding? 3 days of diarrhea.
I refused to believe that the healthiest food known to mankind had caused the runnies, and blamed daycare, the dogs and my own lax disinfecting practices. The only healthy thing C had eaten in 24 hours was that damned pita! And it was organic! How could it do him any harm!?
Moving on, a week later or so, we’re shopping hungry as is our custom. Trying to live up to Gwinnie, I gave C a beautiful organic apple to snack on while I downed a Coke Zero shopped for more healthy food, ahem.
This time it was projectile vomit. All night.
I began to see a pattern.
If I give him organic vegetables, I can be assured of runnies for 12 hours, and some projectile vomit to boot if I’m lucky.
Yet if I, against my better judgment, allow C some Mc Donald’s fries it’s all smiles and giggles.
I am so losing this battle. Healthy food or healthy kid?
What will it be?
That’s great. Stick with local food – it makes just as much of a positive impact as organic, and it’s also GOOP approved.
(Gag)
CDG recently posted I Knew I Shouldn’t
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ofthesea Reply:
January 20th, 2011 at 2:34 pm
I wonder what C will think of lemon-flavoured flax seed oil. It’s all the rage at GOOP, I hear.
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CDG Reply:
January 20th, 2011 at 2:35 pm
Gag me.
CDG recently posted I Knew I Shouldn’t
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LOL! That is odd? You should run controls, lol, it would make a funny experiment, for your readers that is.
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ofthesea Reply:
January 20th, 2011 at 12:01 pm
You’ve piqued my scientific interest. Stay tuned.
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Go with the fries… my daughter would prob die without the fries LOL
Someone even asked me if that was all I fed her. Rest assured its not even close.. but it was funny!
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ofthesea Reply:
January 20th, 2011 at 9:25 am
It’s annoying: I go as far as to order salads and whole chicken breasts when we eat at fast food places… and no. It’s all about the fries for the BC!
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Stephanie Reply:
January 20th, 2011 at 10:25 am
My daughter will not eat anything else from fast food places. Chicken nuggets, hamburgers, NOPE, only fries lol. However a sit down restaurant, she does better with salad, pasta and other foods. Nothing wrong with the occasional fries! :-)
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ofthesea Reply:
January 20th, 2011 at 12:00 pm
C also eats parts of the burger. And ketchup. He can eat ketchup alone!
But just like yours, he’ll eat anything homemade …as long as it’s not organic!
Wow- who knew you could even BE allergic to organic food?!
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ofthesea Reply:
January 20th, 2011 at 9:24 am
Beats me. Maybe it’s SO healthy it makes his digestive system hyperactive? Maybe he’s an evolved human who thrives on sodium and saturated fats?
I’m gonna take this to the lab!
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New Bad Mom Post:Reason #136 – I force my toddler to eat food that makes him sick. Read it now! http://1000reasonsimabadmom.com/reason-1...
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altait Reply:
January 20th, 2011 at 11:38 am
@Mofthesea LOL. I wonder if Gwyneth secretly has this problem.
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ofthesea Reply:
January 20th, 2011 at 7:50 am
Probably not. I bet her kids don’t poo, or puke, or wake up crying in the middle of the night for NO REASON I CAN DISCERN… wait, we’re still talking about her kids, right?
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Carrie and the Bear Reply:
January 20th, 2011 at 8:00 am
Thanks for making me laugh while drinking my coffee this morning.(FYI coffee in the nasal cavity is not at all pleasant) I was going to send you the link to Gwynnies latest GOOP newsletter and the article I found about it but I wasn’t sure if she counted as some sub-species of ostrich or if it was just some fun reading for Mommas out there.
ofthesea Reply:
January 20th, 2011 at 9:25 am
She’s both ostrichy, hilarious and incredibly irritating. I just don’t get it – why does she insist so much on trying to bill herself as a “normal” person?