Reason #174 – The happiest place on Earth? You bet.
Reason #174 – The happiest place on Earth? You bet.
Aug 03Disneyland park in California is famously billed as the happiest place on Earth, and we recently set out to discover how true this is.
It is bloody true.
My exhaustive research and careful planning paid off: we had a quick and uneventful drive and minimal queues to get in, and we started enjoying ourselves within minutes. We started with the old classics – Peter Pan, Alice in Wonderland and the iconic teacups were a blast.
A propos of blast, the Buzz Lightyear shooting range is too much fun for words! Peew! Peew! Peew!
And while we were in Tomorrowland we hit “Captain EO”, back after 20 years as a tribute to the late Michael Jackson. Shamone!
Tip: the Pirates in the Caribbean ride is not all that. If you have to queue for more than 10 minutes, skip it.
My sister is still mocking me because I nearly crapped my pants on Splash Mountain (I’m not very good with heights, so sue me.) And does anyone have an idea of which film that one is based on? Because I don’t. Stupid squirrels lulling me into a false sense of security before OHMYEFFINGGODIMGOINGTODIEEEEEEEEIEIEIEIEIEEIE!
The new-ish Indiana Jones and the spanking new Star Wars 3D adventures were our absolute favourites, so much that we actually got a second Fast Pass to ride Indiana Jones again. Awe-some. Words fail me.
Through the day we managed to eat everything under the Anaheim sun: corn dogs, beef skewers, buckets of Coke and even a chocolate-covered Mickey Mouse-shaped ice cream. It was ridiculous but delicious, and that stupid mouse got what it deserved.
I’m a legendary sop, and I kept misting up whenever I saw a favourite character. Snow White? Tears. Bambi? Tears. Chip and bloody Dale? Tears. But that was nothing compared to the fireworks show – a show designed by the best minds in showbusiness to tug at every last heartstring in the human psyche, so much that it made my sister and I end up hugging with tears streaming down our faces while Dumbo flew over Cinderella’s castle and “Baby Mine” played over the speakers.
My goodness. The floods of tears.
Real tears.
Real crocodile tears, because you know what?
C stayed with the Dane.
That’s right – I went to Disneyland and I did not bring my son.
14 hours of fun and junk food in a multi-million park with no kid to look after?
Now that’s what I call the happiest place on Earth!
And you want to know the absolutely worst part? Worse than depriving my boy of 14 hours of fun and junk food in a multi-million park billed as the happiest place on Earth?
I didn’t even bring him anything.
Mwahahahahaaahaaaa!
Sounds like way too much fun :) and I have the answer to your question: Splash Mountain is based on characters from Disney’s “Song of the South” from 1946
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
August 14th, 2011 at 5:57 pm
Never EVER heard of it! Damn misleading rabbits, throwing me off a cliff!
[Reply to this]
Alisha Reply:
August 15th, 2011 at 4:21 pm
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Song_of_the_South. Check it out. I saw parts of it when I was young. But thinking back on it, there’s no way Disney could release it nowadays. Definitely not politically correct …
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
August 17th, 2011 at 8:01 am
Baahahahaha! Good ole racist Disney! XD
If I were to go to a theme park, I wouldn’t bring my son (who’s now 14 months old) either. He can’t sit on most of the rides, so he’d be in a stroller, in the heat of the sun (or not, but it can be hot in the shade, too), having to eat commercial baby food, and getting his bum wiped with a wet wipe in a crowded public restroom before putting on a disposable diaper. If he were home, he’d be getting home-cooked food, able to play with all his toys and sleep in his cot instead of in a stroller somewhere hot and noisy. He’d get his bum washed and a cloth diaper. He’d be happier and so would I, not having to plan everything around his needs. So, yes, I think it’d be far better to leave a toddler at home than take him to even somewhere as nice as Disneyland. You can take him when he’s older and able to take more of the rides.
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
August 8th, 2011 at 9:35 am
AMEN!
[Reply to this]
“I didn’t even bring him anything.”
Pah! It’s Disney. You’ll pay, eventually. Mwaaaahhhhahahahah!
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
August 8th, 2011 at 9:36 am
My sister DID get a pair of ears. Am I off the hook now?
[Reply to this]
Anne-Marie Reply:
August 8th, 2011 at 11:06 am
Well, I have no idea. It’s not up to me. It’s up to how many sequels of “Cars” they can put out after C is cognizant of kid movies.
[Reply to this]
You are fabulous. I kept wondering why you thought it was so great and then you dropped the bomb of not bringing him. We are planning a trip to Disney World in November with our 3 girls. I can’t wait to scare the crap out of my 5 year old on Splash Mountain!
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
August 8th, 2011 at 9:37 am
It must be so much fun with a 5-year old! Just try not to yell too many profanities – I certainly did! :$
[Reply to this]
While going on an all adult trip to Disneyland might be bliss, any combination of theme park and toddler is hell.
They go into sensory overload and explode.
Actually even souvenirs from theme parks can have this effect.
You did well to protect C from this.
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
August 8th, 2011 at 9:39 am
I knew it was not as bad as it seemed! Thanks for the rationalization! ;)
[Reply to this]
I’m assuming you didn’t bring him anything, so that there is no proof of your heinous deed for him to hold over you when he is older? LOL Glad you had fun! I’m insanely jealous of your trip, with or without a kid! LOL
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
August 8th, 2011 at 9:40 am
Come over, red rover! I live 40 minutes away from Anaheim!
[Reply to this]
Crocodile tears? I was confused when I read this because Dumbo and Baby Mine would have reduced me to a blubbering mass (I found out quick that I could not sing this lullaby to Bear without crying LOL)
And then I read:
I went to Disneyland and I did not bring my son.
My jaw dropped. I was silent.
And then I giggled my silly head off!
GOOD FOR YOU!
Last year a small group of my husband’s family and I went to the new gigantic water park, Calypso, near us. Of course I only got to ride only one or two water slides because we brought Bear with us. It was so much fun, if you weren’t me. I had a good time, but believe me, I miss the days where I could mingle at a party, ride all the rides, do more scary stuff on Halloween……….
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
August 8th, 2011 at 9:40 am
Go out after dark, enjoy a brunch, have sex, keep a neat house…
Those were the days.
[Reply to this]