Reason #183 – I ruin my son’s perfect beauty
Reason #183 – I ruin my son’s perfect beauty
Aug 23Boil my foot and call me Brenda – I may have just ruined the Blessed Child’s perfect looks!
Or should I say locks?
I swear I don’t know what came over me.
C and I were in the bathtub, and I was combing out the yuck from his scalp after a good soaking with olive oil – pretty good cure for baby dandruff, thank you all! – and suddenly the combination of wet hair and comb took my back to my old beauty school days.
Because I am a trained professional, ahem.
And before I could think twice I reached for my hair-cutting scissors (because I do have professional grade scissors, stop your smirking), combed C’s duck tail into submission, and snipped.
My plan was to simply get rid of C’s baby mullet, which offends the Dane to no end, but one thing led to another and before I knew it I was cutting bangs and sideburns.
It only hit home when I saw how blonde the hair in my hands was – I had just chopped of the glorious golden curl tips! AUGH!
The boy, needless to say, is neither pleased nor enthusiastic about what just happened.
Me, I just pray he’ll still look cute tomorrow when the hair dries and the curls set back in.
Please send us hats! (Or money to buy them!)
Wow! Is there anything you haven’t been!? You sure are a woman of a thousand stories!
I’ve given unfortunate haircuts- to my CAT. That little fucker seemed hot; it was like 115 out, for real. So a “butt cut,” which is a cut only fluffy cats get to remove the everpresent dingleberries of dung, the butt cut turned into a “shaving.”
Five minutes before they came home, I actually had this thought: Maybe my parents won’t notice if I hide the cat from them for a month or so. Yes, I can hide a 20 lb cat from my father, whose first words in the door every night are “Where’s BITER SCRATCHER!?!?!?”
Yes, I was an adult at the time. But my cat baby seemed HOT!!!
I’ve never had to give him another dingleberry prevention cut ever again. Magically, he learned how to effectively clean his furiness.
So you have two advantages:
1. Hair grows back.
2. Due to the anatomy of human hair placement, you could not have possibly scratched C’s fragile man nipple with office scissors, turning him into first a screaming banshee, and then a permanent neurotic.
So I hope I have learned this lesson for when I have an actual human baby- no cutting for heat regulation!
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ofthesea Reply:
August 23rd, 2011 at 11:21 pm
ROFL dingleberries, biter scratcher, man nipple, office scissors! ROFLOL!
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definitely some after pictures required!
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ofthesea Reply:
August 23rd, 2011 at 11:21 pm
Coming up tomorrow! *shame*
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Lemon juice and camomile tea mixture, comb through, go out in sun. Should work!
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ofthesea Reply:
August 23rd, 2011 at 11:22 pm
SO doing this tomorrow!
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After D continuously got called a little girl (I’m talking a daily basis here despite the fact that I ALWAYS dress him in overtly boy apparel – ok, there was the one time, but he was only a little over a year and yeah…), I submitted to peer pressure and took him (screaming) to a kids’ hair salon. I paid them $25 for the priceless memory of a traumatized toddler trying to climb every which way out of the cute little rocket ship chair and a mediocre but cute boy looking cut. So now we’ve become friends with Daddy’s clippers and a No. 2 length guide. The curls are gone, but he hasn’t been mistaken for a girl (or a redneck) since.
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ofthesea Reply:
August 23rd, 2011 at 11:23 pm
Perish the thought of giving my little boy a buzz cut! I prefer the clumsy-but-free momma haircut …at least till he knows better and demands a trained professional!
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I took 2.5″ off my Turkey’s hair a while ago. That cute little blond upcurl from straight hair? Yep, gone. Her daddy didn’t talk to me for a couple hours, but she STILL loves it!!!!
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ofthesea Reply:
August 23rd, 2011 at 9:18 am
My heart is *broken* at the loss of the blond curly tips. The Dane, on the other hand, loves that he now “looks like a boy”.
I’m tempted to at least give C a spritz of Sun-In to get the blondness back!
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I hated the 1st time we cut off my sons beautiful thick curls… but they grew back ;)
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ofthesea Reply:
August 23rd, 2011 at 9:18 am
I can’t wait! I miss the curls!
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We had the baby mullet oging on for a while too. Mine did not have curls though :(
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ofthesea Reply:
August 23rd, 2011 at 9:19 am
Oooh, that must have looked funny too!
I do admit C’s baby mullet was starting to get to me. But I won’t cut so much next time!
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