The world is pretty evenly divided between Those Who Cook and Those Who Wash, and I am firmly in the first category. And while I can make a risotto with the best, it is a fact of life that I have always hated doing dishes. With a passion. I have been known to bargain, cajole, bribe and blackmail to get out of doing dishes.
Yet now I choose to do the dishes instead of playing with my son.
If you invite me to eat at yours I will accept graciously, arrive punctually, bring wine and dessert and C, and be a charming dinner guest who will clean her plate and compliment your walnut-balsamic dressing. And after the meal I’ll breezily say, “Here, why don’t you play with C a while and I’ll do the dishes for you?”
All protestations are futile: I’d rather do a huge load of dishes by hand than look after my baby, and there is no persuading me.”Oh, but I see C all the time, and you get to enjoy him so seldom!” (See what I did there?) Then I’ll grab a fresh glass of red and head to the sink.
Doing dishes is so relaxing, it feels almost like a form of Tai Chi: soap, stack, soap, stack. Rinse, stack, rinse, stack.
The water gurgling makes such a peaceful sound.
My mind wanders off as my hands take care of bowls, cutlery, pans.
“No, really, it’s no problem. I’m happy to do it. Yes, I know I used to loathe doing the dishes. Funny, that.”
Please, feel free to crawl on all fours after my freakishly strong and fast child, remove every potentially unsafe object from his hands/mouth, lift up all 10 kilos of him for a horsey ride (and another, and another, and another) and sing as many silly songs as you can come up with.You’ll be tired before he’s even warmed up.
I’ll just be here quietly with my glass of wine, scrubbing this pan until it shines.
And then I’ll dry everything. By hand.
One. Piece. At. A. Time.
What a lovely meal, thank you so much! Let’s do this again soon!
Related Reasons:
23 Comments
Leave a Comment
Donate and support the cause!
I love:
Feeling guilty?
Grab a button! It’s free!
The fine print
I'm happy for you to use my writing within reason. When in doubt, just ask!
However, PHOTOGRAPHS OF C ARE COMPLETELY OFF LIMITS: NO USE OR REPRODUCTION OF ANY KIND IS ALLOWED WITHOUT MY EXPRESS CONSENT.
(Why? Because he's my son, that's why.)
I am sooooo with you on this. It’s because the dishes do what you tell them to do.
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
August 25th, 2010 at 10:28 am
I just like that I don’t have to chase them. And that once I’ve cleaned them they STAY clean.
Is that so much to ask?
[Reply to this]
You’re joking, nobody hates doing the dishes more than I do.
For your entertainment:
http://www.francoamericandream.com/no-domestic-diva/
That being said, this is only the start of mobility sister, you watch. The best has yet to come.
[Reply to this]
Oh can you please, please, please come do my dishes for me? Seriously, I’d do anything other than dishes. What’s wrong with me? You make them sound so lovely…
kelly @kellynaturally recently posted Missing Things
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
August 8th, 2010 at 1:03 pm
Oh trust me, back in the day I’d do ANYTHING other than dishes. Now apparently I’ll do anything other than play with my poor boy!
And I’m taking you up on that invitation! ;)
[Reply to this]
This is SO one of the things I miss about Rob being gone. When he gets home from work? The kids are his, because I have to make dinner.
And I hate cooking. But after our second, I’m so exhausted by 4pm, that our meals became MUCH more labor intensive and elaborate. Sometimes? After dinner? I need to get a head start in preparing for tomorrow’s meal. ;o)
Kelsey recently posted Something is Wrong With Our World
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
August 7th, 2010 at 12:11 am
That should have totes been a confession. Clever lady, clever!
[Reply to this]
Love it. So true. warm water, soap suds, wine & silence. You could almost make believe you were in the bathtub……ahhhhh
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
August 7th, 2010 at 12:10 am
Wow, exactly! It’s the closest thing to a bubble bath I’m gonna get!
You people are gonna put me out of a job, you’re so much better than me!
[Reply to this]
Our journey has begun!… secretly though
If I’ve left you this message, you’re a follower of my original blog ~OR~ just someone I’ve happened upon while sending out these invites and that I would LOVE for to come along for the ride! Though I won’t be revealing who I am just yet – until we’re TO and THROUGH the first trimester! Just getting the word out about our new site – further explanation of all the secrecy and what we’re about on my first post. I’d love for you to stop by.
Exciting things going on around here!
http://www.DefinitelyMaybeBaby.com
~ the {secret} *Maybe* Baby Mama
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
August 6th, 2010 at 9:34 pm
I am intrigued like the shizzle!
[Reply to this]
I love this – I found you through your comment on SITS and I’m definitely a follower! I have a ‘Why I should be nominated as mother of the year award’ list and it follows the crap mom concept!
My bad mom confession for the day – the kids were driving me crazy yesterday so I hopped the baby gate and sat on the computer for a minute (or 10) while they were in the other room tearing it apart. When they finally found me I let them stand on the other side for a minute and beg me to come get them :)
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
August 6th, 2010 at 3:28 pm
Making them miss you! Love that!! We moms should play hard-to-get more often for sure.
Thanks for a great idea, and hope to see you again soon! :)
Did you see our ostrich hunt?
[Reply to this]
I completely hear you on this one…as a mom we rarely get breaks especially when they are just babies. The idea of having 15 glorious minutes in front of a sink lost in thought instead of doing what you always do…entertain!! sound like heaven! My thing that I prefer doing…cutting the grass!! It is hard work (I have an acre) but it gets me outside in the sun, exercising and working on my tan…not to mention NOT tending after my 5 and 7 year old!
How Does She Do It Mom recently posted Stress 101
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
August 6th, 2010 at 1:24 pm
You make mowing the lawn sound good. How do you do it? ;)
[Reply to this]
Hell, anything to get a moment to yourself, right?
Allison @ Alli ‘n Son recently posted The Best of the Best
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
August 6th, 2010 at 1:23 pm
A N Y T H I N G
[Reply to this]
Me, I cannot wait until Cameron’s old enough to wash dishes by himself. Dishes tie with cleaning the cat’s litter box for worst chores ever in my book.
But yes, I can understand that dishes wins vs yet another endless game of peek or horsey with a little one. So been there. So loving that now Cameron can more or less entertain himself!
Melanie recently posted Ow
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
August 6th, 2010 at 11:25 am
I count the days! My knees are in TATTERS from crawling after/with/around him, and my lower back cannot take many more “bungee baby” stunts.
That said, I have lost a TON of weight.
And everybody invites me to eat at theirs! ;)
[Reply to this]
I hate doing the dishes, too. But if I can get out of holding my kids back from destroying the house for awhile, I’m all for it.
C @ Kid Things recently posted Safety 1st
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
August 6th, 2010 at 11:14 am
Sing it, sister!
[Reply to this]
Washing dishes IS totally zen! Your post reminds me of the book “Peace in Every Step”
There’s a whole essay in there about the zen of doing dishes. I love it!
[Reply to this]
ofthesea Reply:
August 6th, 2010 at 11:13 am
Don’t get me wrong, I still don’t like it. But it beats crawling after C!
I’ll find my peace where I can, I guess…
[Reply to this]