Reason #81 – I keep my baby awake against his will
Reason #81 – I keep my baby awake against his will
Sep 08It is 4am, and all poor C wants is to go to sleep.
But I won’t allow it!
C’s eyelids droop, his little body goes limp, yet I keep turning him this way and that, stretching and bending his limbs, and even forcibly removing the bottle from his clenched cherub’s mouth.
C’s life sucks big time.
Why can’t he just snuggle into the duvet right here and sleep, like he so evidently wants to? Why must his evil stepmother keep shaking him when he’s clearly nodding off? At 4 am, even?
First: I was fast asleep and HE was the one who woke me with the Whining of Doom.
Second: I was going to just give him a bottle and put him to pasture, but he was really insistent about wanting dry jammies.
Third: I was NOT the one who weed into said jammies in the first place.
I am terribly sorry, C, but you have a chest cold and you are wet up to your shoulders. I would have let you sleep, but now that you brought this to my attention I must do the responsible thing: strip you down to a bare ass, wipe you dry, and then re-dress you layer by layer till you’re a snug little baby onion again. No, you can’t just go to sleep in your diaper and nothing else. Sorry, you also need a vest. And a fully zipped-up romper. And if you don’t stop this fussing so help me I will also make you wear a double-breasted tweed jacket and plus fours!
I don’t let my poor poor baby sleep. How mean.
Let me sum up this late-night fiasco one more time: C wakes me up, C makes me change him, then C decides he just wants to fall right back asleep.
While half naked. With a chest cold. At 4am.
No way, Jose.
I never let C do what he wants to.
Not even sleep.
You are a better mother than I am! I only keep my baby up late so that we can sleep in late!
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ofthesea Reply:
September 13th, 2010 at 12:09 pm
I have tried that, but it doesn’t work for us: C is an early riser regardless of what time he goes to bed. Boo.
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Seriously, how daring is this?
C’d better stop this whining business, mama needs some sleep.
Or does she? Seems to me mama is all over the blogosphere, if you told me she got any sleep, I would not believe it!!
You crack me up :-)
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ofthesea Reply:
September 9th, 2010 at 8:08 am
I write on my iPod while C settles down in the wee hours. It’s called “making virtue out of necessity”!
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That is indeed cruel, although letting the poor kid marinate in his own pee is probably worse. Keeping him awake is the lesser of the evils, he’ll thank you for it someday. After you remind him of course. ;)
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ofthesea Reply:
September 8th, 2010 at 3:22 pm
Well, as I’ve stated before, I’m not above letting him marinate till tender and juicy.
But he has a pretty nasty cough, and the cold wetness was not gonna help.
Also, he woke me up. He so deserved it!
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k – if you’re the crap mom, I’m the lazy mom. V so would have been sleeping nekkid…guess there’s no winning for trying.
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ofthesea Reply:
September 8th, 2010 at 3:20 pm
You know how it is: anything you say/do WILL be taken against you in court.
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Might I suggest toothpicks under the eyelids and duct tape to hold them in place? LOL You’re a nut !! I love it !!! And C is lucky to have you.
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ofthesea Reply:
September 8th, 2010 at 9:51 am
“Saw” for babies! Love it!
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